On April 20, 2007 I began this email that I never finished or sent (back then I had no idea about blogging!):
What happened at Virginia Tech was a terrible tragedy. I don’t agree with the publication of the video and photos that this murder created either. We are giving these psychos more ammunition by giving them their 15 minutes of fame!
So, who do we blame? Who is going to be punished for this horrible crime that has affected so many lives? Me? I blame myself, a little. I blame myself for every time I treated a stranger poorly just because I was in a bad mood. I blame myself for cutting off the old people that are not driving fast enough, and for cursing at the younger people for cutting me off. I blame myself for not saying “Hello. How are you?” enough. I blame myself for ignoring people that may have need my help, or even just my attention.
It’s not ok to shoot people. It’s not ok to make fun of people, nor is it ok to talk down to people, but at least that can be taken back. Do we punish the children that make fun of other kids in school? Do we punish the ignorant people that are racist or sexist because that is how they were raised? How do we stop these people from thinking that killing mean people is ok? I was made fun of when I was little. I was too fat, I was too blond, I was too dumb, I was too smart. Do I kill people? No. Do I want to? Maybe sometimes I would like to think about causing someone else physical pain, but I never really would. Do I mean to be mean? Not usually, but sometimes I am anyway.
So, what do we do? Don’t tell me that we need to ban guns, if I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times, “GUNS DON’T KILL PEOPLE!!! PEOPLE KILL PEOPLE!!!!!!” So, what do we do?
How many shootings have we had since then? How many crazy events. It’s strange to think that 9/11 hadn’t even happened yet.
And 7/20/12, another shooting. Another random act of senseless violence. I even saw one report assuring the readers that it was confirmed the shooter was not affiliated with any terrorist group. Seriously? He was a terrorist. He shot up a theater full of unarmed people!
So, what do we do?
I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. I’m going to hug my kids just a little bit more. I am going to tell people I love them a bit more often. I’m going to work hard not to cause extra nonsense. I’m going to work on my patience. I’m going to stay vigilant about keeping my guard up. I am going to continue to be ridiculously aware of my surroundings. I’m going to continue to keep those that were affected by this tragedy in my thoughts. I’m going to change the channel when they put that terrorist on t.v. I am not going to Google him. I’m not going to wish him ill. I am going to simply not give him his 15 seconds.
When you read this, please remember to not give people 15 seconds of fame for doing something so deplorable. Instead, focus on the kid down the street that is staying in school and out of trouble. Focus on the husband and wife that are still together light years past any Hollywood couple. Focus on the parents that discipline their children with a strong voice and (maybe even sometimes) a firm hand.
I was not raised to take out my anger on others. Does it happen? Absolutely. Do I regret it later. Yes, I do. But if I am mean to someone, say things I may not mean, at least I know I can go back later and say I’m sorry. And that they are still around to forgive me.
Take a minute today. A minute of silence for those that have lost their lives. Whether a life was lost from natural causes or an untimely and tragic incident, there is always someone that mourns. Take a minute to appreciate the little things. Take a minute to acknowledge what someone else did to make the day better.
